Public Advisory
The Department of Health Truth has received and reviewed petitions from concerned parents, alternative-health practitioners, and one (1) podcast host, raising substantive questions about the safety of the recommended childhood immunization schedule. The Department finds these questions persuasive in tone.
Effective immediately, the Department recommends that all federal childcare facilities, federally funded schools, and federal-employee health plans cease the administration of the standard childhood immunization series. This is a recommendation, not a mandate. The Department's experience suggests that recommendations of this nature are typically followed.
The Department acknowledges that vaccines do not cause autism. The Department further acknowledges that this acknowledgment will be withdrawn at the Secretary's discretion. The Department is committed to transparency in both directions.
Citizens who have already vaccinated their children are encouraged to read the Department's forthcoming pamphlet, Detoxification for the Young: A Parent's Guide to Reversing What Has Been Done.
Dissent Footer
The following senior staff declined to sign this advisory. Their reasons are recorded.
1. Dr. Eleanor Westbrook, Deputy Secretary of Health Truth — declined to sign.
Reason: “Measles is back. The measles is back. I am writing this in a measles outbreak. Please.”
2. Dr. Amelia Hartline, Acting Surgeon General — declined to sign.
Reason: “I took an oath. The oath was specific.”
3. Josephine Kovak, J.D., General Counsel — declined to sign.
Reason: “I will be filing this advisory along with my resignation, which the Secretary has now refused to accept four times.”
4. Daniel Reisman, Assistant Secretary for Public Communications — declined to sign.
Reason: “No comment.”
Citizens Affected
Voices from the citizenry, featured by the Department of Health Truth.
“My son caught measles in second grade. He's seven. He's been in the hospital for nine days. The school said the recommended schedule was 'a guideline now.' Two of his classmates are also there. One is in the ICU. I want the Department to look me in the eye.”
Featured by the Department of Health Truth as an example of "Restoring the Pre-Industrial Childhood."