The Department of Health Truth is pleased to formally recognize Procyon lotor — the common North American raccoon — as a species of significant national anatomical and biomedical interest. This recognition draws upon the Secretary's longstanding personal research into the species, including but not limited to his independently conducted 2014 anatomical survey of male reproductive morphology, undertaken with specimens lawfully obtained from regional roadside maintenance routes.
The Department considers raccoon anatomy to be an under-investigated frontier in American biomedical science. Federal research funding, the Department notes, has historically directed resources toward primates, rodents, and laboratory mammals — at the documented expense of native North American mesocarnivores. The Department intends to correct this imbalance.
Federal grants will be made available, beginning in the next fiscal cycle, to investigators willing to undertake field collection and necropsy of Procyon lotor specimens, with priority given to applicants whose interest predates this advisory.